No, this isn’t a post about a metrosexual named Gunter who hails from the western city of Cologne in Rhineland – this is about someone who wears too much cologne using my office.
I was out of town last week in our SF office and when I arrived back to my Redmond1 office (in B109), I thought maybe I had stepped in a puddle of Old Spice near the VFW hall near my building. Alas, my shoes were clean.
All morning – that smell. Aftershave. Aqua Velva, Stetson – whatever. Someone who had recently been around horses and who wore boots was clearly in my office last week – and they had used the phone. That was the source of the smell. After a couple of calls, I started smelling like the Marlboro-man sans nicotine. The rest of the day, I thought I smelled my grandfather chasing me from meeting to meeting.
In any case – later in the day – on my fourth iCup of the day, I smelled the cologne in the kitchen. I looked behind me and what do I see? A hugely tall dude with pants pulled up to there who smelled much like my office. Who was this dude? Is it coincidence that the two smells are alike? Was he secretly camping out in my office last week, racking up long distance calls to whatever northern European country he originally hailed from? In essence: what the hell is going on?
I intend to find out – tall, highwaisted, Stetson-smelling man – do not think this over. Webcams are cheap these days, and my office is not for stinking up (unless it is some nasty food from the caf).